Food. Let's start there. I eat food (which should be amply apparent from simply looking at my picture). I like food. Food likes me, which must be why it sticks around for so long after I've eaten it. We're all one, big (butt) happy family.
However, there are times when food goes awry. I'm not talking cooking. No, no, that is a subject for an entirely different day. I'm talking about when food fights back.
Let's be honest (because really, what's more fun than that?). I've got a natural shelf that tends to catch food as it jumps from the fork in an attempt to run for freedom. The shelf comes in handy—except when there is a white shirt and spaghetti sauce involved. Then I curse the shelf and hope I have a jacket in the car.
Once in a while the food misses the shelf (not sure how mind you) and goes for the pants. This morning I was eating some cottage cheese with a cut up nectarine in it for breakfast. Yummy. I'm happy to be sitting here thinking about it . . . Oh! Sorry.
So a single curd (if that's what they're called) of cottage cheese jumped from the fork, somehow managed to miss the shelf, and landed on my pants. This little guy was spry. He didn't just hit my pants once, no, he bounced around and got his cottage cheese sauce in at least four different places.
I had no idea cottage cheese curds (yes, let your mind wander to squeaky cheese curds for a moment) were naturally bouncy. I guess I learned something today. I should have learned to keep one of those Shout wipes in my purse.